I’m working on a new book. The first book is still in the production stages: copyedits, layout, proofreading. I just have to finish the last round of copyedits and then it can move on to the next stage.
In the meantime, I’ve been pondering book #2. I have a great topic, a whole pile of books to read for background information, and lots of ideas. But I just can’t get anything down on paper. I sit in front of a Word document with the cursor flashing at the top left of the page, and I can’t write. Nothing comes to mind.
The goal of book #2 is to examine the relationship between being outdoors and having a mental disability. It is bracketed by a visit to the Rocky Mountains in 2022 when I was paralyzed by my illness, and a return visit this year (2024). In between, I hike our local mountain three times a week to get more confidence on the trail and, when we return in 2024, to hopefully avoid the paralysis and anxiety that characterised my 2022 visit (spoiler alert: we went to the Rockies last week and I had mixed results).
I’m a pantser, not a plotter, so not being able to put something on paper is new to me. I’m used to just writing and something interesting will come out of it. But in this case I’m thinking hard about structure. My first book was relatively easy to write in that it follows a chronological structure and relies heavily on my memories, notebooks, field notes, etc. While I had originally envisioned book #2 as ‘A Year of…,’ I now see it as a series of themes that lie outside a chronological framework, but are strung together with a through-line about being a woman outdoors with a mental disability.
This is why I can’t seem to populate that blank page. I have reams of notes from each of my days on the local mountain, but I don’t know how to put them together.
I’ve re-read John McPhee’s DRAFT No. 4, and Jane Alison’s MEANDER, SPIRAL, EXPLODE. I’ve explored the theme and collage approaches in Priscilla Long’s THE WRITER’S PERSONAL MENTOR. But something clicked in my mind when I read Maggie Smith’s YOU COULD MAKE THIS PLACE BEAUTIFUL. Smith plays with structure a lot. Her book is fragmented and collage-like, but generally follows a chronological timeframe, interspersed with vignettes and poems. It occurred to me, a week after I read it, that if she could do it, so could I.
So now I have new ideas of how to structure Book #2. I want each chapter to have three main things: a photo with alt-text, a single sentence, and prose that moves the narrative forward. Each chapter will be on a different theme, while maintaining the same structure as the other chapters.
This requires much more planning than I did for my first book. I don’t know if I can pull it off. And so the page remains blank. Maybe I need to map out the structure more clearly in advance. Something I’ve never done, but that this new book is stretching me to do. Maybe I should write a proposal before trying to tackle the sample chapters, as that will force me to think about how to put the book together.
And maybe that’s another reason the page remains blank. I’m moving into new territory, pushing the boundaries of my writing experience. And that’s how it should be—we never learn if we don’t push ourselves.
But at the same time that I’m afraid of and intimidated by the blank page, I’m also a tiny bit excited. This could be an experiment that fails, but it could also work brilliantly and fill up page after page of lucid, relatable text.
Maybe I have to do some more reading. Some doodling. Some mind-mapping. I’ll probably have a few false starts. But I’ll eventually put something on the page. Just maybe not right away.
This sounds amazing, Sarah – difficult in pushing boundaries but really creative and interesting. at first I was thinking a series of (loosely linked) essays, but what you have described here sounds fascinating. Can’t wait to read it! And so happy to hear the first book is well under way too!
Thanks Shelly! I’m thinking hard about this next book, it will still be a series of essays but with other techniques included. Now I just have to figure out what I want to say!
I’m kind of there where you are too, except I’m a little afraid of putting words down on the page because what if the excited anything-is-possible feeling disappears?
We’ll get there.
Yes, there’s that, too – what if the excitement wanes? Writing is not for the faint of heart lol.